Home birth after 3 medicalised hospital births
Read my clients feedback of her experience of Independent Midwifery care during the pregnancy and birth of her fourth child.
After 3 hospital births, all involving one induction method or another, I decided to look for an independent midwife during my 4th pregnancy, and I’m so glad that I did. What started with a desire to just avoid unnecessary medical intervention actually resulted in better antenatal care, a quicker and easier birth and a supportive postnatal period. Debbie allowed me to experience pregnancy in a whole different way; one in which I was allowed to be a person with my own opinions and beliefs.
Under the NHS care team, all of my pregnancies were deemed to be intermediate or high risk due to me having hypothyroidism, and after my first baby had measured small when born this only exacerbated the amount of intervention I was expected to have for subsequent pregnancies. The consultant obstetricians would review my pregnancy regularly along with regular growth scans during the third trimester. All of my babies have been small; Healthy but small. And because of this I was always leaving the consultants office with a plan they had decided for me which I was expected to blindly follow.
It was quite obvious to me after three children that what everyone else was treating as some kind of abnormality was just my normal. But it wasn’t until I spoke with Debbie that I realised I didn’t have to go along with their plan. As long as I was informed about the risks and benefits, I could make a decision that was right for me and with Debbie I didn’t have to fight my corner. She fully respected my ability to process the information and decide what I wanted.
The idea of giving birth at home had not really occurred to me until my third hospital birth which was during covid. Because I didn’t want to comply with all of the excessive regulations, I was immediately made to feel unwelcome in the delivery suite. Also, being a muslim woman who covers, there are many aspects of labouring in hospital which I don’t find appropriate but which are almost unavoidable in the hospital setting. For example, the use of Internal examinations to assess progress. For my first two children I believed internal examinations to be a necessary part of labour. However, it became very clear that I did not dilate typically. In both of these labours I had remained 1 or 2 cm until right before I was ready to push. It seems I go from 1cm to fully dilated in a matter of minutes not hours. Therefore, having an internal examination only causes me distress and gives the healthcare team the impression that I’m not progressing when in fact I’m actually close to the pushing stage.
When I attempted to explain this to my midwife for my 3rd birth she said she understood but that she would be asked by her seniors and so it would make the process easier if I allowed them. So even though it is a distressing, invasive procedure which gives little to no information and effectively stalls my labour for a while, I was still persuaded to ‘consent’ to the procedure.
I felt like I was a burden to my birth team; that they didn’t really want a patient like me and this really impacted my labour. I usually cope extremely well in labour relying on breathing techniques and relaxation, however, I wasn’t able to relax and so my labour was overwhelming and painful.
When I became pregnant this time with my 4th baby I was praying that I could have a home birth. I had watched documentaries about the medicalisation of birth and started listening to podcasts about home birth and it changed my whole perspective. However, I knew that it would be difficult for me to have a home birth on the NHS with my history of hypothyroidism and my babies being small. From what I had read, even women who were deemed low risk were having difficulty having a home birth on the NHS, and that’s why I started looking into hiring an independent midwife.
Antenatal appointments with Debbie seemed more like a good catch up with a friend than the usual cold tick box appointments I was used to. There was always plenty of time to discuss any concerns and I had a real feeling of freedom with the care I was receiving. I didn’t have to do anything which I didn’t feel was necessary and I was never pressured into making a specific decision. Debbie always informed me of the pros and cons and then completely respected my decision. It was a breath of fresh air in comparison to the condescending tone during consultant appointments.
As my due date approached I felt confident in my birth team. Debbie had taken the time to understand what I would prefer during labour (namely a quiet and calm environment with little interference) and I knew that even if I had to be transferred to hospital for whatever reason, she would come with me and advocate for me and this made me feel at ease with however my birth would turn out.
My birth experience was everything I had hoped for it to be. I felt safe and protected in my favourite place, my own home. I didn’t have to worry about there not being a midwife available for a home birth as I had heard had happened to other women. I knew Debbie was waiting for me to call her and that she would be there for me. There were no unwelcome interruptions of internal examinations or ward rounds but a respect to allow my body to do what it needed to do. I caught my own baby in the birthing pool at home and was tucked up in my own bed with her a few hours after. The difference was like night and day.
After the birth, Debbie came to see me with thoughtful homemade snacks which were perfect for a new nursing mother. She offered me as much support as I needed but as this was my fourth baby I didn’t really need much. All in all, having an independent midwife allowed me complete autonomy in my healthcare and real informed consent. Sadly, this is something rare under NHS consultant care in my experience. Thanks Debbie, I’m so grateful I got to experience pregnancy and birth under your care!
F, February 2024